Something fishy going on with new gadget

I am so happy.  Today I got my Humminbird 788ci.  With this marvel of modern technology, I will be able to tell if I will be able to stand if I fall out of the boat (depth finder) and tell where the bottom of the bay is (down) and know if there is something passing under my boat (fish finder).  I will also be able to tell EXACTLY where I am when I fall out of the boat trying to determine what just passed under my boat (GPS).  Now that’s technology!

Yes, my combo unit can do it all, albeit at a price.  I have paid less for computers (desktops AND laptops).  It does have a 5 inch 256 color display and two, count em two memory card slots – how’s that for high capacity storage?  Of course you have to have at least one slot to hold your maps.  What’s that you say?  The maps aren’t built in?  Don’t be silly my little mullet, of course there is a map built in.  Unfortunately, it only shows whether or not you are on land.  If the GPS shows you on the yellow part – you are on land, blue part – water, just like that, no options required.  What’s that you say?  You want to know if you are in the ship channel and are going to be swamped by a 5 billion ton tanker?  Well, that’s going to cost you.  They have a chip for that.  That’s their slogan, catchy isn’t it?  The “chip” is a memory card with map data on it.  It tells you all kinds of things like where the channel markers are, submerged wrecks, names of reefs and islands.  You just pop one of these little beauties in your unit and you immediately become well informed.  Pretty useful stuff – once you have paid the piper.

Linda was the one that made room in the budget for this luxury purchase, but I don’t think her reasons were listed above.  I think the number one feature she cares about is the depth finder.  She cares less about whether or not she can stand but how shallow the water is getting as we cruise along at 40mph.  Hitting that sand bar at speed will send you flying like one of those guys with the cannon in the circus but unlike him, you won’t know it’s coming.  So I think she sees it as a better investment than flying lessons.